One Step At A Time

 by MTLBear

When I look back on everything that has happened … I can’t help but wonder if it was all by chance … or if somehow it was by design … a carefully planned, step by step design. I wouldn’t put it past my mother to have planned it all out … but since she is no longer with us … I will never know for sure.

I think it all started just before my father died … but again I can’t be sure. He died many years ago … when I was 14 … and unfortunately I can’t really say I miss him. Don’t get me wrong … he never hurt or abused me in any way … but he also never praised me or complimented me either. He never encouraged me in anything I ever did and he never once came to any show, or recital or concert I was in. He just sat in the back room and watched TV. My mother used to joke about it and often said “He only leaves the back room when it’s time for a meal … time for a bathroom break … or time for bed.” She said it so often that it soon stopped sounding like a joke.

Step 1

The first step (as I call it) happened the one and only time my father stepped out of the back room for something other that the usual reasons … and it would also be the night I took a step in a new direction … sexually. It was at supper that my father and I discovered my mother had planned an evening out for the 3 of us. She said everyone was talking about a new show in town and that she had run down earlier in the afternoon and got tickets for tonight’s show. My father grunted something about TV but my mother insisted. The money had already been spent so my father soon backed down. We gobbled up our supper and soon were heading out to the town auditorium. I had no idea what to expect … I was just excited to be doing something with BOTH of my parents.

As we drove to the show my parents had a very strange conversation ... most of which went right over my head (at the time). But after a few minutes I was able to figure out that we were going to something called a hypnosis show (whatever that was) and that my mother’s friend’s husband was weak and my father was strong and my father was going to prove it to my mother. (I had visions of the two husbands wrestling each other … so hypnosis was like wrestling ???) But then I understood that the other husband had been to last night’s show and that was where he had been weak. I was so confused.

The posters for “The Man They Call Ravine” were kind of odd. The picture was of a very nice looking man (or at least I thought so) with a goatee … his hand reaching out to the viewer … but both of his eyes were sparkling. He was also wearing a fancy shirt that was open, revealing a very hairy chest and several gold chains. I don’t know why but seeing his hairy chest made me tingle all over. I think it was because it reminded me of my gym teacher … who wore very tight short shorts and was always ripping off his sweaty t-shirt to reveal a very hairy chest … ever since the first day I started gym class … I really just liked being near him … him and his hairy chest. Sadly it took me a few years to finally figure out why.

When we got to the entrance my mother told me to NOT say a word and stand tall and look old. Again I was confused but I always did what she said. I usually slouched over because at my age I was much taller than most of my friends (I shot up early … or so said my mother) … and I was embarrassed to be a bit taller than my older brother who was off at University. A lot of people mistook me for him … so I didn’t think anything of it when the person taking the tickets said something to my mother about how it was nice to see that Ricky (my brother) was home for the weekend.

My mother had bought great tickets … 10^th row … so when Ravine came out … I could see his hairy chest very well (he was wearing a similar shirt to the one in the poster and it was open as well. Let’s just say seeing him in person really got me tingling all over!!) My mother had insisted on sitting between my father and I … and she seemed very excited about something. And one more time she said to my father … “I can’t wait for you to show me how much stronger you are than Vicky’s husband.” I got an image of my father wrestling Ravine and I knew Ravine would win … he looked very strong and muscular.

Ravine started to talk and everyone in the auditorium really seemed to want to listen … with the rest of the place in darkness and several bright lights focused on him … it was hard not to look at him. He talked a lot about hypnosis … how it was something like sleep … but most of what he said was lost on me. I was just happy to watch him walk around and show off his hairy chest. (a thought crossed my mind that maybe I shouldn’t be so interested in his chest … but it soon was gone as he turned and looked in my direction) Then he said he wanted the best people on stage for his adult show and he needed to figure out who would be the best … with a little test.

I was ready and willing to do the test since I really wanted to get closer to this man … it was the gym teacher all over again … just being next to him was all that mattered. He told everyone to extend their arms in front of themselves and to stare at their hands. As I started to do as he had asked my mother grabbed my arms and pulled them down, whispering “You will NOT be going on stage … we were lucky you are so tall that they didn’t ask for ID. This is an 18 and over show … it was the only tickets I could get … so you will sit there and plug your ears and only unplug them when I tell you to. And don’t you dare say a word to your father”. As I plugged my ears I looked over and saw that my father’s arms were extended and he seemed to be staring at his hands intently. My mother had a smirk on her face as she watched my father intently herself. She seemed so happy … I was even more confused.

But then I was distracted by the man sitting next to me (the other side of my mother) It was uncanny but the man looked very similar to my gym teacher … but his upper body was much bigger than my teacher’s. (I found out much later that this man was actually my gym teacher’s older brother … who played professional football). My father used to watch a lot of football while he was sitting in the back room and sometimes I would see part of a game when I went to call him for supper. I was always impressed by the huge bodies they had and how tight the pants were that they wore.

I had a funny feeling this guy played football … but what I really loved was that he had a tank top on and like my gym teacher he was hairy as an ape. Hairy muscular arms .. hairy full chest … beard … moustache … my body was tingling so much I was almost giggling. I also liked when the football guy’s hands and arms started to lift up and suddenly they were pulling him out of his seat (or so it seemed). His eyes were still staring at his hands and all I could think was what his nice big thick legs would look like in those tight football pants.

After what seemed like an eternity … my mother nudged me and said I could remove my fingers from my ears. I sat up and looked around and noticed that there were a lot of people standing in the audience … my father included. But when I looked at my father and the football guy I noticed they had now closed their eyes and they were standing there like statues. It was all very surreal … how could they be sleeping while they were standing up … it caused a lot of tingling, especially in my crotch, a new feeling for me. My mother looked at my father and whispered to herself “I knew it. This is going to be so much fun.”

Ravine said something about not being able to move until he was touching some part of the body and said the word “Release”. And this point he went into the audience and started to touch people … saying “Release” … and watching them carefully as their hands came down. I was curious what he was looking for … but he didn’t seem to choose everyone. (If you asked me … he seemed to be only choosing the good looking people from the audience … but I’m no expert).

Of course Football guy and my father both ended up being chosen and sent to sit on the chairs set up on the stage. (I guess I forgot to mention … my father was very good-looking … or so people said … something about a guy named George Clooney) When Ravine came to our row to talk to them, I was so close to him I was able to hear him whisper something to both of them about a deep sleep-like trance when they sat on the chair … and when both of them sat down on stage … they both seemed to fall asleep again. I can’t tell you how excited I was to have Ravine standing that close to me. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. He noticed this and was about to say something when my mother said “I think not”. Ravine smiled at her and walked on to the next statue. She smiled at me and said … “maybe another time”. I had no idea what she was talking about.

 After Ravine finished going around the entire auditorium … there were about 30 people on stage. The men outnumbered the women 2 to 1 … which was funny since the audience was mostly made up of women. The lights in the auditorium dimmed (I hadn’t noticed that they had been raised) and that is when I found out what a hypnosis show was all about. Ravine welcomed us to what he said was going to be “a night none of you ladies would ever forget.” I turned to my mom and was about to say something about me not being a lady … when she said “Be quiet and listen. David, I know something about you that you have not come to realize yet. I heard about this special show for women and knew I had to bring you.”

She turned away from me and looked towards the stage. “And I was hoping to see your father in a whole new light and it looks like I will .. thank goodness. I want you to sit back and relax and accept that however your body reacts to this show … it’s alright.”

She looked me directly in the eye and with a very forceful tone say “You will not be ashamed … you will not be embarrassed … everything that happens will be good. It will all be just fine. Got it.” All I could say was “Whatever you say, Mom”.

Ravine explained that even though it looked like it … the people on stage weren’t asleep … just in a very relaxed state … a state that allowed them to accept suggestions from him and do what he suggested … without question. (I don’t know why but I suddenly got a picture in my mind of Ravine, Football guy and my gym teacher all in that state in front on me … waiting for MY suggestions. My penis started to get hard and I didn’t know why. Before this moment… it had only gotten hard when I rubbed it. But it didn’t upset me … because my Mom had said it would be OK. The funny thing was … the only suggestion that came to mind was … remove your shirts and let me rub your hairy chests. Weird … but exciting).

The show lasted for two hours … with an intermission of 15 minutes. After Ravine’s first suggestion that all of the men were strippers … the men spent the rest of the show in their underwear ... something clearly both my mother and I really enjoyed. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case for everyone. The woman who had been sitting next to the football guy (I assumed she was his wife) … started to get upset and became very vocal. She seemed angry that her husband was parading around in his underwear … showing off his body for everyone to see. I kept ignoring her but at one point someone said … “Lady he is one hot man and you are selfish for wanting to keep that much manliness to yourself”. I was actually surprised that my father was in pretty good shape. He was actually one of the best strippers and a lot of women seemed to love his smooth chest. (I often wondered why he was so smooth and my brother and I were so hairy.) My mother kept telling everyone that that was her husband … the one filling out his underwear to the max and looking so hot. (Of course this only seemed to make the football guy’s wife even angrier)

Ravine explained that some men found the whole hypnosis thing very arousing and that’s why “little Johnny” was standing at attention. (he said this with the men all lined up in front of the stage and then took the time to point out each man whose penis was pressing against his underwear … football guy and my father were two of these men. Mom was thrilled … someone else was not.) The women in the audience went wild … my mother included. By now it was obvious that the women on stage were only there to be used as props to make the men go crazy. They rarely did more than shake their boobs or wiggle their butts … and this was with their clothes on. It seemed like Ravine was using them more and more as the intermission approached. And then he said … Men … I want you all to go back to your seats … and you will not realize you have left your clothes on the stage. But as every second of the intermission ticks by you will get more and more aroused … not knowing that everyone can see what’s happening in your underwear. When you hear this music … you will come back on stage … you will sit down in a chair and you will get ready to shoot a load like you have never shot before.

You will moan, you will groan, you will gyrate, you will be unable to control the amount of pleasure you get from that seat. Suddenly it was intermission ! I could tell I wasn’t the only one that could hardly wait for the intermission to end. Even though my Mom was fixated on what was happening in my father’s underwear … she was even more anxious to see him sit on his chair on the stage. Football guy and his wife were having a huge argument right next to me. They had gone for drinks while yelling at each other and now they were back and the yelling had increased. His wife was trying to convince him that he was sitting in a jock strap and he just wouldn’t believe her. She kept telling him she was so embarrassed and wanted him to go on stage and get his clothes so they could leave. He kept telling her she was crazy … he was fully dressed and the she was embarrassing him. She finally stood up and without saying another word … stormed out of the arena. Football guy turned to me and said “That woman is nuts. Feel this shirt and tell me that that’s not the nicest silk shirt you have ever felt!” He grabbed my hand before I could say or do anything and placed it on his bare, hairy chest. “Feel it!” he commanded … and I obeyed. It was like nothing I had ever felt before. My head was swimming and my dick was rock hard. I think all of the blood in my body was surging to my dick. After I rubbed his chest a few times he said “Well ?”. All I could say was “Very nice”. He smiled at me and I melted.

Suddenly there was an announcement that intermission was over and football guy’s eyes just as suddenly got very glassy and a dazed look appeared on his face. He turned to the stage and smiled as he looked at the chairs placed there. As he stood up I was shocked to see how huge his penis was as it pushed hard against his jock strap … trying to break free. When I heard my mother let out a squeal, I turned to see my father standing, staring at the stage, his underwear looking like a tent with a huge pole in the middle. Both men started to walk slowly to the stage and when they sat down it was unbelievable to see what happened. They both started twitching and writhing along with all of the other men who had returned to the stage. Off-stage, Ravine suddenly yelled “CUM NOW” and they all let out a huge collective moan and stains started to appear in the front of every pair of underwear that was on stage as they all pumped in rhythm.

Ravine ran out laughing and encouraged the audience to applaud as the men fell into what look like a nice wonderful sleep. Ravine woke them all up and told them he had a little surprise for them back stage and they really wanted to see what it was. The men ran off stage as Ravine stepped forward and started to talk to the audience. He asked “So ladies, did you like that ?” … everyone in the audience, but me, hooted and howled. He smiled and said “It sure seems to be getting hot in here.” With that he whipped off his jacket and threw it back stage. The audience hollered again. “You liked that did you ?” Ravine asked. When everyone cheered, he slowly walked to the front of the stage and said “Then you’ll probably like this as well”. He slowly … sexually … invitingly started to undo each of the buttons on his shirt. When he was finished, he whipped that off as well and threw it back stage. “Now I feel much better”, he said ,…”How about you?” I found that I was cheering with everyone in the arena … men as well as women … he had such a nice hairy body and he sure seemed to like to show it off. He smiled and said “It’s just that I always feel so over-dressed if I keep those on for this next part of the show!”

With that he ran off-stage and just as quickly the men came out in very, very skimpy bathing suits … their dicks still rock hard and barely covered. They all were posing as if they were in a muscle-man show and let me tell you … a lot of them could have been. Even my father looked hot … they had put oil over all of their bodies and when I saw football guy it sent me over the edge … my body convulsed as a stain started to appear down the front of my pants. It felt wonderful … it felt so good … it felt so right … I never wanted this show to end. But it did and luckily, my pants were dry by then … but

not for long. Ravine had one more trick up his sleeve to drive me crazy. He told us he was going to wake all of the subjects up but he was also going to give them one more command that he thought everyone in the audience would like. It went something like this “Men, after I wake you up you will grab your clothes and head back to your seats not really sure what happened but feeling very horny. After you sit down, when the person beside you says “Go, baby, GO!” you will do a private little dance for that person, showing them how turned on you are. Once you are happy with what you’ve done, you will sit down and everything from the show that you want to remember will come flooding back into your memory. And you will realize you had the most amazing time and you will tell everyone about … “The man they call Ravine”. Thank you for coming … 1, 2, 3 … wake up !

I saw the men gathering up their clothes and I suddenly realized something … football guy’s wife was gone. I was the only person who would be sitting beside him. I was the one who would have to say “Go, baby, Go”, and with that football guy was going to do a private dance for me. My penis was suddenly rock hard again. I wasn’t sure if it would work. I’m sure Ravine meant that the wives would say it. But that seat was empty … and I was beside him. The thrill of it working was driving me wild. Football guy sat down beside me, placed his clothes on his wife’s empty seat and looked around confused. My heart was pounding but I was ready to say the words. “Gobabgoogo” came out of my mouth and football guy looked at me strangely. I heard my mother cheering and I knew it was now or never. I cleared my throat and tried again “ GO … BABY … GO”. Football guy suddenly stood up and started rubbing the crotch of his skimpy bathing suit … the one he was still wearing. He whispered “Feel how hard I am” … and I did. He looked around and saw that everyone was busy so he said … “This is for you” and he pulled his dick out of his suit. I started to shoot another load as he quickly pulled up his bathing suit … sat down and started to shake his head in disbelief. He turned to me and said “Sorry about that buddy … I didn’t know what I was doing.” I said “No problem. You were amazing.” He looked at me for a few seconds and then quickly got dressed and left the arena. I turned to see my father giving it all for my mother. I suddenly could see why my mother had married him … he was a very sexy dancer.

As you can imagine, my fantasies from that moment on all involved hypnosis … with the football guy … with Ravine … and strangely enough … even with my father. I decided I was never going to tell anyone what had happened … I knew I would be embarrassed if I tried to explain what the show had done to me. But I had enjoyed it !!! It had freed me … it had shown me things about myself I hadn’t known and it had definitely started me on the next step towards my new sexual life. But I was NEVER going to tell this to

anyone !!!

Step 2

After the magic that was my first hypnosis show, (an adult hypnosis show at that), I was into hypnosis more than I had ever been into anything in my life. More than Sesame Street … more than the transformers … hypnosis became my life. Ravine had been able to get men to take their shirts off … and their pants … and their underwear … and made them do much, much more. I knew I wanted to have that power … I knew that someday I, too, would have that control over any man I saw !!!! I think what drove me the most was the way my penis had reacted. It had confused me and excited me all at the same time. I wanted to have that feeling again … and I was going to do anything and everything in my power to make it so.

The day after the show, when my friend Randy asked what I had done the night before … I clammed up. I wasn’t sure I could trust even my best friend with this deep secret about myself. Randy lived a few doors down and I had known him all my life. We were best friends and told each other everything … that was until the day after the hypnosis show. And he knew I was holding back … but he didn’t push it. Having been home-schooled by my mother for my elementary years … Randy was the only person my age that my mother let me associate with. And when my mother informed me I was going to be attending a school for high school, Randy offered to show me the ropes and keep me out of trouble. And he did and he made the transition much easier than it could have been. And yet ... even though I owed Randy so much, I still couldn’t bring myself to tell him about my new love … hypnosis. Even for all the times he made me laugh and all of the times he was there for me … I decided that hypnosis was my dirty little secret that no one else could ever know about. Never say ever.

The problem was how to proceed. I decided to go to the big public library to see what I could find out. (I didn’t want to be seen looking up “hypnosis” at my school library, so I thought it best to be among a crowd.) But of course Randy wanted to come with me when I told him I had some research to do for a school project and I had to go alone. He didn’t believe me but he let me go. He tried several times to get me to let him tag along but I always refused and I could see he was hurt … but what could I do ?

I found a few books by Melvin Powers like “Hypnotism Revealed” and “Hypnotism” by George Hoben Estabrooks but they weren’t enough ! I needed more. I started to read about self-hypnosis in books like “Self-Hypnotism” by Leslie M. Lecron. But I wanted more. I scoured the second hand books stores all over the city for anything … silly books with men hypnotizing women on the cover … books on how to do it and what happened when you did it and why it worked. I began to have the strongest desire to try it on someone and then I came across “Advanced Techniques of Hypnosis” by Melvin Powers and I KNEW I had to try it on someone ... but whom ? I needed to see what happened when I tried certain inductions … I needed to see what they meant by “depth of trance” … I needed to see if I could set up triggers that worked. I made notes … I wrote modified inductions … I tried to write down everything Ravine had said … I was very obsessed. And Randy was very upset.

After two months of me ignoring him one day he came over to my house and dragged me downstairs to the basement. I could tell he was really angry ... he hadn’t said a word. He looked me straight in the eye and said “I know what you’re hiding from me and I don’t care.” I was shocked at first but then confused … he didn’t care that I was into hypnosis ? That didn’t make sense. He continued “I don’t care because … I’m gay too”. I was so relieved … I thought he had seen me somewhere getting one of my many hypnosis books. Randy was gay … wow … I had never really thought about that. All I knew from my few years at high school was that gay was bad … and that gay meant you liked to kiss guys. Then I thought … I haven’t really thought about kissing guys … but I have sure thought about a lot of other things I’d like to do with guys … and suddenly it dawned on me … like Randy … I was gay too. During this entire thought process he had sat there staring at me and was waiting for a response. I knew the time was now or never.

“Randy, thanks for sharing that with me … and yes I am gay … but that’s not what has kept me busy for the last two months”. Now he looked confused “But the trips to the library … the research … I did all that a few years ago … when I first suspected what I was. So you weren’t researching what it really means to be gay?” he asked. “No” I said plainly. “But then what have you been researching all this time?” he asked. And the floodgates opened. “Hypnosis” I said and began to tell him everything. I told him about everything that happened at the Ravine show … I told him about the notes I had been taking … I told him that I was dying to try out what I had learnt but had no idea where I could get a subject. He said “Don’t look at me. You’re not going to turn me into some zombie! Your brother’s coming home in a few weeks for the summer … why not practice on him. He is SO hot I would love to see him do everything your father did.” It was funny but I had never looked at my brother in a sexual way … he was my brother. But now Randy was admitting that he found my brother hot and wanted me to hypnotize him. For the many rotten things my brother had done to me all my life … I knew he would be the perfect first subject. And like Ravine, I had an assistant … I began to plot my strategy the minute Randy went home. My brother wasn’t going to know what hit him. He would be putty in my hands before his first week back was up !

Step 3

For the first time in my life I was actually looking forward to my brother coming home. It’s not that I hate him or anything … it’s just that we have very little in common. He likes sports … I hate them (except for soccer … I’ve always found men in shorts nice to look at). He is a big jock (and has been for years) and I am taller, skinnier, and not very coordinated on any sport’s field. He uses his body to get what he wants, I use my brain. I love theatre … he likes strip clubs. The only thing we really have in common … other than our parents … is our love of performing. He does it on the football field and I do in the school band, the school choir, and as part of the school theatre program. Dad used to go to all of my brother’s games (when he was the star quarterback for the high school team) … and my brother never let me forget it. As he punched me over and over he would say things like “Dad likes what I do more than what you do! Dad says you’re going to grow up to be a sissy !”

But now I was going to have complete control over my brother … what sweet revenge. I was going to make him Randy’s sex toy (whatever that meant … it was a term Randy kept using). I was going to be like the coach I liked to be near … I would be able to make my brother do whatever I wanted … push ups … sit ups … jumping jacks … anything to make his muscles ache. I had read a lot about the fact that you couldn’t really make someone do something they would not normally do while under hypnosis … so you would think I would be discouraged. But I wasn’t. I had also read how if you convince the person of a certain scenario … they will definitely do things they might not normally do … if it fit the scenario. The problem was I had so many scenarios that I wanted to try on my brother … I thought my head might explode. But then there was also the terrible nagging fear that kept haunting me. I had read that, for some reason, there was a percentage of the population that couldn’t be hypnotized. And that there were some people who only ever reached a light trance. I just hoped that my father’s ability to be controlled easily was genetic and that my brother would go deep …and do it quickly.

The day my brother arrived, ended up being nothing close to what I had thought or planned. My brother was in a very pissy mood when he came into the house and so was my father. It seems they had had a fight on the drive back from the airport. I had planned to help my brother unpack ... as a gesture of brotherly love … but also to start a rapport with my new subject. I was hoping to get a few tests in to see how suggestible he was as well. I couldn’t believe that 3 months earlier I had no idea what hypnosis really was and here I was planning my training sessions as a hypnotist. To say I was nervous was an understatement. But it was just my brother … and if he figured anything out … he would just beat me up like he always did anyway. But it was a little hard to start a rapport with someone who had slammed and locked his bedroom door moments after entering the house.

I heard my father upstairs explaining what had happened to my mother and how she quickly took my brother’s side. This infuriated my father and he started yelling. I now heard what had transpired. On entering the car, my brother had presented my dad with a letter from the university he was attending. From what I could hear from the basement … my brother’s marks were getting so bad that he was in jeopardy of losing his football scholarship. My father kept screaming … “How can we pay for his last two years of university … we don’t have that kind of money.” And my mother kept trying to stick up for my brother “Maybe he would be better off at another school … maybe they don’t know how to teach him there”. I was waiting for my father’s reply … but none came. What happened next was quite shocking. Suddenly, I heard a thud upstairs and my mother screamed. The rest is all a blur.

The doctors said my father died instantly from a heart attack. They blamed it on his lazy ways and a weak heart valve. But I know both my brother and mother blamed themselves for what happened. I was terribly saddened to watch my mother and brother crying all the time. They cried at the hospital when nothing could be done to help my father. They cried at the funeral palour when everyone tried to give them their condolences. They cried at the funeral from beginning to end.

Because of this … a lot of things fell to me to take care of and I realized, at the age of 14, that I was a bit of a control freak. The flowers had to be perfect at the funeral parlour. I chose the music for the funeral service and got upset when the choir didn’t perform it just right … I had remembered songs my father always enjoyed and wanted it to be perfect for my brother and my mom. I even organized all of the food at the wake … the caterers were impressed. But amongst all of the sadness and pain … there was one bright moment. My high school coach showed up at the wake. I immediately went to him and thanked him for coming. He looked very different in a suit … a suit that was too tight to fight his muscular frame. (I loved that his chest hair was sticking over his shirt collar!) I was wondering why he had come when my brother came running over to coach, hugged him, and started to cry on coach’s shoulder. It dawned on me that my brother had had him as a coach as well … so I figured coach had probably spoken to my father at many of the games. I kept looking around to see if anyone had noticed the effect coach was having on me. (Is it rude to pop a boner at a funeral ?)

By the end of the whole ordeal, my mother was slowly but surely getting over it. Her friends had convinced her it wasn’t her fault and she stopped crying all the time. On the other hand … my brother was a total mess. No one could convince him that it wasn’t his fault that dad was dead. His letter had caused it and he was to blame. I kept telling him the doctors had said otherwise but he wouldn’t believe me. He just kept bawling his eyes out … morning till dusk. It was tough to watch my big jock brother cry like that. One day he approached me and asked how I was able to be so strong. I wasn’t about to tell him the truth … my brother didn’t need to know I wasn’t that sad … so I decided to take another tack. “I learnt a relaxation technique that helps me find inner peace. I could teach it to you if you want ?” He looked at me very skeptically. Then he said “OK … but if it don’t work I’m beating you up.” The door was now open and yet all of my feelings of revenge were gone. I truly wanted to help my brother get over his grief … and guilt. I was sure hypnosis would work.

I used the focus induction … where you get someone to focus on a certain thing. I told my brother to focus on his favourite football trophy … and try and remember the way he felt the day he received it. I talked and he stared … with a smile on his face. Little by little … with my words and his concentration … his smile faded … his eyes closed and his head drooped. I had gotten my brother into a trance. My voice had finally stopped quivering by the time he closed his eyes. It worked and I got a second wind. Everything I read came back to me and I let him have it with both barrels. As I had hoped, my brother seemed to be as suggestible as our father. He went very deep … very quickly. I know this because every test I did on him indicated that he was in a very deep, deep trance. I couldn’t believe it had actually worked. I had hypnotized my first subject and my head was swimming. I started to give him suggestions to help him out of his current state. But I also gave him one small trigger … telling him he would go back to this state whenever he heard me say “Night, Night Football Star”. My good deed for the day done … I woke up my brother making him forget everything that had happened.

After a few more weeks everything seemed better. My brother had stopped crying … my mother had found out there was a huge insurance policy on my father and that the house would be paid for, my brother’s education would be paid for and there was even going to be enough for me to go to university. Everything was getting back to a normal pace. That’s when the phone started to ring. Randy, finding out that all was much better, kept calling and asking “Is it time yet ?”. And I kept saying “NO”. I told Randy I was not about to try hypnotizing my brother while he was still so full of grief. Of course, I neglected to mention to Randy that I had been hypnotizing my brother for the last 3 weeks. I told myself … I needed to get experience. I told myself that since my brother was such a good subject it made it easier to learn things. And I told myself it was fun making his arm freeze midair or to making him forget his name … each time taking him deeper and deeper.

I couldn’t believe how much I was into hypnotizing my brother. After the first time I told myself I wasn’t going to use my brother as a guinea pig while he was so vulnerable. I told myself I wasn’t going to take advantage of him just because he was my brother. But then … two days after I put him under … he had stopped crying and seemed back to his normal self. And when he cornered me in the basement and threatened to kill me if I ever told anyone what had happened … it just slipped out “Night, Night, Football Star”. It kind of scared me how hard he fell to the ground. It was then that I realized I had a lot to learn … I should have said something about sitting down first. So after that … I looked at the time I spent hypnotizing my brother as my hypno-education. It wasn’t some pent up desire to get even. It wasn’t that I was drunk with power ! I was getting my patter down … I was getting comfortable saying all the words that at first made me laugh. (“Deeper” just seemed funny to me). I wasn’t plotting some evil scheme involving my brother Ricky and my friend Randy. Who was I kidding ? That’s exactly what I was doing. And now that Randy was calling … I started to plot out what was going to happen. I kept telling myself that I just wanted to get my brother in a compromising position so that I could take pictures and use it to blackmail him into being nice to me. I just didn’t want him to ever tease, threaten or harm me again. Does that make me a bad person ?

Seeing him go into trance so easily was so amazing I was almost addicted to it. And to think that soon Randy would be in the same boat … made my body tingle. I know it’s hard to believe but it wasn’t about sex. Neither of them did anything to me sexually. Randy was short, blonde, hairless and in good shape. I’m sure lots of people were attracted to him. Not me. And my brother, even though he was a football player … (remember how Football Guy had driven me crazy) … my brother had to run a lot during each game. Or so he told me … so he wasn’t big and bulky. Muscular, yes, big legs, yes, hairless, yes (he shaved his body hair) … but he just didn’t turn my crank. (He was my brother after all!!!) So it wasn’t the thought of having sex with them that thrilled me (not that I really knew what two men did together anyway) … the thought of making them have sex with each other was what was really turning me on. Being in control of them was HOT. Making people bend to my will … thrilling. Once a control freak … always a control freak.

Working all those months with my brother was wilder than I had ever imagined. I set up so many triggers that if I sneezed the wrong way Ricky went into trance. I made many mistakes along the way … but I was always able to recover from them. I was very confidant about my skill as a hypnotist and I was sure putting Randy under was going to be a breeze. My chance came when my brother decided to stay home one Saturday and my mother went away for the weekend with a friend. I told Randy to come over early Saturday morning and that’s when the fun began.

I told Randy that I had told my brother that I was going to teach him (Randy) a new relaxation technique I had learnt. I told Randy my brother said he wanted to watch. Randy wasn’t so sure about it. I told Randy it was the only way. He just had to pretend to listen to my voice … then he had to pretend to relax … and by watching him …. my brother would do the same. I told Randy that the worst thing that could happen would be that he got a bit relaxed. I also kept telling Randy that my brother was looking especially buff these days because to work out his grief he had started pumping weights every day. Randy was thrilled by this and promised to be on time. (Of course that was a little bit of a lie … my brother was lifting weights … but it was because of me …. Randy didn’t need to know that)

Saturday morning arrived and all of my fears came rushing back. What if Randy was a terrible subject ? What if my brother had been extra easy to put into a trance and Randy was going to be super hard? What if I couldn’t get Randy under ? What if I’m only a crap hypnotist who think he’s good ? So when Randy rang the bell, needless to say, I was a nervous wreck. But I was also turned on like you wouldn’t believe. I set up a candle on the kitchen table and told Randy to sit down on one side of the table. I called my brother and when he walked in I made him sit on the opposite side of the table from Randy. I pulled the curtains, dimmed the lights, and lit the candle. I started slowly … in a low calming voice … telling Randy to stare at the candle. I knew my brother would do whatever I said so they would be staring at each other and at the candle. And so I

began …

“Randy, I want you to empty your mind and stare at the flame. Don’t think of anything other than the flickering of the flame. Let it all drain out of your mind … leaving your mind empty … blank. Nothing is as important as watching the flame and listening to my voice. Listen … watch … listen … watch. You may find it hard to keep your eyes on the bright flame but you can blink and that will make it easier. You can do it. You can watch and listen … listen and watch. I want you to relax as you watch the flame and one easy way to do that is with big breaths … take a deep one in … and let it out … in … out. Every breath relaxes you more and more. You may find you want to close your eyes … but then you can’t see the flame. Blink if you have to but you know how important it is to stare at the flame.”

Up to that point I hadn’t had the nerve to look at either of them. But I finally had to see what was happening. My brother was staring intently at the flame as I knew he would … but my dick jumped to attention when I looked at Randy and saw him staring at the candle as well … his eyes blinking constantly. Maybe he was pretending … maybe he wasn’t. I had to find out. So I continued my patter …“As you stare at the flame now, you can feel the warmth of the flame start to spread throughout your body. Such a nice, warm, relaxing sensation. And as your body relaxes more and more you find it harder and harder to keep your eyes open.

I will count down from 5 to 1 and when I reach 1 you must close your eyes and let that warm relaxing feeling go all over your body. 5 … warm relaxation … 4 … eyes getting heavy, hard to keep open … 3 … every breath relaxing you more and more … 2 … total relaxation sweeping over your entire body … 1 … your eyes must close as you go deeper and deeper into relaxation … listening to my voice … obeying my commands.” I looked up and both of their heads were slouched over and their eyes were closed. I was so thrilled that I started jumping for joy … silently. (I didn’t want to snap Randy out of his trance) It seemed that Randy was a good subject too. How lucky can a hypnotist

get !!!

My lack of sexual experience at the time I got them both under was why I think things went the way they did. If I had only known what true gay sex was … things might have gone better. If I had known that when two men get together … it’s not like any of the movies I had seen. (Actually even non-gay sex isn’t like what they show in movies … or even porn for that matter) All I knew is that Randy wanted to have sex with my brother and I wasn’t really sure what that meant. So I thought I should go to the source … I decided to ask Randy what he wanted to happen.

I woke Randy up telling him to forget being under and to be really excited that I had gotten my brother under. When I hit 5, Randy snapped awake and started jumping around … all excited. “It worked … it worked” he kept yelling. I said “You expected anything less?” He ran over and hugged me. So I asked “What do you want first ?” Without skipping a beat he said … “Make him strip … in a very, sexy way” I said “I think I can do that.”

I put on my command voice “Ricky, when I get to the number 5 you will open your eyes and you will realize that you are the best male stripper ever. You have just walked out on the stage and the women are screaming for you to strip. You’ve seen enough female strip shows to know how to drive them all wild … and you know that taking everything off is in your contract. When I count up and hit the number 5 … you will hear some music and you will put on the sexiest strip show ever. 1 …. 2 … 3 … 4 … 5” I was standing by the stereo and turned on a CD with very slow, sexy music and then I ran and sat beside Randy.

I was amazed at how good my brother was as a stripper. He is hairless and muscular … not something I find attractive … and yet I was getting very turned on … by my BROTHER! Randy was going crazy. I noticed that I wasn’t the only one hard as a rock. My brother was subtle … slow … sexy … teasing … funny. I knew what I was going to be getting on film some day !!! (Talk about blackmail material!!) As he got down to his jockstrap (a jock wearing a jock … what a surprise) I was shocked to see my brother was hard as a rock as well. Randy had become quite quiet as he stared intently at my brother’s protruding jockstrap. He was massaging his crotch at the same time as he stared transfixed and I got worried he was going to shoot his load. When my brother whipped off his jockstrap I quickly commanded them both to go back into a deep, deep trance. My heart was racing … my dick was throbbing and I was smiling from ear to ear. I guess it had been a success.

This time I decided to ask Randy what he wanted … while he was still in trance. He replied in a very monotone voice “I want to be the master of Ricky … I want him to kneel before me … I want him to be my slave and to suck my dick until I come.” Wow … I wasn’t sure what that was all about but I thought I’d give it the old college try. I told Randy to listen as I gave naked, hard Ricky his new instructions. I told my brother that when I said the number 5 he would wake up and realize that Randy was the master of the house. And as the master of the house could ask any of the people who lived in the house to follow commands. If the commands weren’t followed then the person might get kicked out of the house. I then told Randy that he was now the master of Ricky and to act accordingly. I then counted to 5.

They both opened their eyes and I saw something strange in each pair. Randy looked kind of maniacal … scary even … and when he stood up and whipped off his pants and then his shirt then his underwear … I was kind of shocked. Ricky’s eyes had a different look … a look of fear … of terror. And I couldn’t figure out why. Before I could do anything Randy sauntered over to where I had got Ricky to sit down and started to bark out orders at Ricky. “On your kneels slave, NOW !” Ricky slid off the chair onto his knee in front of Randy. Then Randy ordered “Now suck my dick like you life depended on it.” Suddenly Ricky started to cry … he curled up into a ball and wailed like a banshee. Randy was upset and started yelling at him. “I gave you an order slave and you must obey. Do as I command or you will pay the price.” This only made Ricky sob even more. I was totally confused by what happened and I knew it had to stop. I ordered them both back to their chairs and into deep trances … which got Ricky to stop crying. My mind was racing. What had I done wrong ? What happened to the two of them ? I turned to Randy and asked him “What does it mean to be a master ?” In his monotone voice he said “I am the owner … the master … he is my slave … and I can treat him any way I like … because I own his body.” OK … that was not what I had thought it meant. I turned to Ricky and asked “What upset you so much ?” In his monotone he replied “He was the master of the house … my father … and he wanted me to suck his dick … I didn’t want to do that … and I knew he would kick me out of the house if I didn’t.” Boy did I have a lot to learn. My heart was pounding again … but not from excitement … from fear. I wasn’t sure if I should try one more scenario … that last one freaked me out.

I sat down and thought … what had I read … what had been something that seemed OK. Nothing came to mind … I think I was too in shock. I was starting to feel bad for having hypnotized Randy. I thought it would be fun … but now it wasn’t so much. And it didn’t look like he was going to get to have sex with my brother. As I looked at them … I noticed that they were both naked. What if I just suggested they have sex … they were ready for it. What harm could come of that. On the count of 5 you will both open your eyes and see the sexiest person in world sitting right across from you. As you look at each other you realize that you are really attracted to each other. And as the seconds pass your passion for each other will build. When I say the word “NOW” you will run into each other’s arms and make wild, passionate sex until I say STOP. 1 .. 2 .. 3.. 4 ..5” It was funny to watch them both. I don’t think they saw the person who was actually there.

I have a funny feeling they each saw a fantasy person. Their dicks were both jutting up when I finally decided to say the magic word … NOW” They ran to each other and what ensued was utter mayhem. I never knew that two men together could be so rough. Randy was squeezing and grabbing and pinching and so much more. And it appeared that anything Randy did … Ricky did it back to Randy twice as hard. At first it was very hot to see two men kissing. I had never seen that before. But then they seemed to be biting each other … and then they started to spank each other and then scratch each other and … before I knew it I was yelling STOP. Now I was really freaked out. Marks and bruises were beginning to appear all over their bodies. How was I going to explain that to them? They were both going to be so mad at me. But then I got an idea. I instructed them to get dressed and then to get on top of each other and then when I said “Awake” they would realize they had been wrestling and that Ricky had just won (I put Ricky on the top)

I said “Awake” and acted like I was trying to separate them. They were both confused as to why they were wrestling. I pretended to get mad … “Well if you don’t remember I’m not going to tell you. Now apologize to each other and I won’t say anything to Mom.” They apologized and Ricky walked away very confused. Randy looked at me questioningly. I simply said “I couldn’t get him under … you made some comment about why wasn’t he as weak as our Dad.” and he went ballistic. I think you better go home .. we’ll talk about it later. Of course I never did.

After all that happened I realized that hypnosis was much more powerful than I had imagined. I still wanted to do it … but in much simpler ways … with much less complicated scenarios. I knew that Ricky and Randy would never remember what had really happened … but I always would … and I hoped it would make me a better hypnotist.

(TO BE CONTINUED)

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